a ghost with a beating heart.

Okay, ready?

So I’m a cashier at Wild By Nature, a health food grocery store that’s only on Long Island. I have to say that I’ve met every single fucking weirdo around here, but I was wrong.

Tonight, I encountered the most horrible… I don’t even know what to call her. So, she comes to my register with this fucking huge cart of stuff, and before she even puts stuff up on the belt, she says “Okay, can you just wash this off before I start?” waving her hand around my scanner. “And can you sanitize your hands for me?” WHAT.

And she tells one of my coworkers to sanitize his hands to and to get 10 paper bags in plastic (I fucking hate when people do this). He accidentally dropped one on the floor and she said “OH. I can’t use that one anymore,” so he put in under the register. After she looked away, he put it back. Lulz.

And then she starts putting stuff on the belt and EVERY SINGLE FUCKING THING IS IN A PRODUCE BAG AND TIED UP. More than one thing were in each bag so it made it a fucking nightmare to scan everything. It took me half and hour to ring everything up. HALF AN HOUR. I can ring up a thousand people in that time.

And then she says that she doesn’t have her store card on her. So I have to ask another coworker of mine to look the card number for me. And the customer states that she wants to get credit for orders she’s done five months ago. You just can’t do that. She didn’t fucking understand. And then she yells at me because her order was so much money. UH, LADY. YOU JUST BOUGHT TWO FUCKING CARTS FULL OF SHIT. OF COURSE IT’S GOING TO BE A LOT OF MONEY.

So my assistant manager was called because she’s just fucking lost her marbles. So THE MANAGER GAVE HER A 10% DISCOUNT BECAUSE SHE WAS WHINING AND CARRYING ON. And then she complained that her receipt listed things that she didn’t buy. UH. DID I PULL THINGS OUT OF MY ASS AND SCAN THEM OR SOMETHING.. God dammit.

So then she and the manager went through every single fucking bag to examine everything. GET THE FUCK OUT FUCKING LADY. So then she ended up getting another 10% discount and that money went back onto her credit card (WHICH SHE SWIPED WHILE HOLDING IT WITH A GLOVE. FUCKING KIDDING ME OR WHAT). 

She got away with like. 150 dollars off a 760 dollar order. GET THE FUCK INTO YOUR CAR AND DRIVE TO YOUR BUBBLE OF A HOUSE AND STOP STEALING MONEY FROM US.

Well, about that.. The one who dropped the bag on the ground had to bring a case of spring water to your car. HOLY FUCK I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM. He comes back with a face that looks like he’s about the stab someone. He said that she had to have everything in a precise spot, by weight order. UHHH..

FUCK YOU LADY.